Subes for life!

I had previously posted my gripes about being on the road, but for the last few weeks I’ve been more stationary. And, that has huge benefits in that my drive time is way down, I have access to a wider variety of foods, there are familiar faces everywhere, and so on.

I still have some gripes. Those big things mentioned a few months back are definitely annoying, but it’s the little things that really frustrate the heck out of me:

• Take my own cup to a coffee house, yet they make my coffee into a paper cup, pour that drink into my mug, and throw away the paper cup.
• Take my own cup to a coffee house, and they still (“accidentally”) charge the $0.25 disposable cup fee for some reason.
• Not signaling when you’re going to turn. For cars and cyclists, especially, but I’m cranky today so I think pedestrians should have to signal as well so we know if they’re waiting to cross a street or are just standing there on their phone or talking to their dog (like they do) or for some other reason and aren’t waiting to cross about 60% of the time.
• Braking for imaginary hazards, aka “random braking.” It’s the equivalent of Tourette’s but for drivers, and we’d actually rather have you saying weird shit and driving normally, so move that foot a little to the right and keep it there. Ask yourself, “What would Deedius do?” and the answer is almost never to use the brakes.
• Not having your money ready at checkout. Or, possibly worse, having a card that won’t work, and having to dig around in a bottomless bag of coins until the goal is reached. The world’s friendliest barista at SCCRCo (“Hi Maddie!”) almost lost her shit one day when a dude paid for his cold brew in mostly pennies and then he still didn’t have the right amount and had to find an EBT to cover the rest.
• In an empty parking lot, when someone parks either right next to me, or quite near me. There’s a reason I park in the fa-fa-fa-fa-far away reaches of the lot, and that reason is because I don’t want to be near you or him or her or them or anyone else. And yes, I give the person a good long stare to see what is wrong with them. One lady at Wilder Ranch actually moved further away when I did that, so acting weirdly can have its benefits.
• Unorganized hikers who take 35 minutes and 105 door slams and then a false start and a return to the car for six more door slams and maybe some shouting back and forth with their partner(s) before all their gear is found and gathered and organized and inventoried and stowed away in their pack for their 20 minute walk.
• Ear-budders. This one may be controversial, and my son Cameron has admitted to being plugged in all the time (also my son Kai, but somehow he was able to instantly turn his off if a conversation [usually me interrupting whatever he’s doing, but yeah he was/is freakishly fast about it….] is about to start — I’m not sure if Cameron has the same ability). You have all those sensory organs for a reason, and hearing is probably #1 in the being-out-in-public-and-not-annoying-others-around-you-by-being-oblivious list of importance. If you can pull it off without being an obstructor, we may find this one acceptable in certain situations.
• Over-sharers. I really don’t want to hear all about your life, or to have to explain anything about mine. The only exception to this is if the over-sharer is monologuing at someone else and then I will for sure 100% be eavesdropping because it usually has some genuinely weird tale and/or turns of phrase going down and I want to hear and make a mental note of every little bit of it. Please, just don’t talk to me because then I won’t really be interested.

And with those in mind, we shall end on a brighter note:

Enjoy your day! [And, stay out of my way!]